Facebook. If you don't like it...

Earlier today while I was perusing through Facebook I noticed a very specific status update.  This person was complaining about people checking into their gyms on a daily basis and how annoyed they were by those "friends" who did this.  One of the people who commented on this person's status stated that this is not what Facebook is for, she went on to say it was for catching up with "friends"...WOW, how naive.

As the day went on I pondered on this status (the office is clearly much slower then normal. ha.) and what annoys me about Facebook; what I came up with is that what annoys me most about Facebook is when people complain about what other people post.

Seriously, people post what is important to them.

I go to the gym on a semi-regular basis.  Do I check in?  Yes. I do. (not lately though, I haven't been bringing my phone) Why?  I think checking into the gym is a way for people make themselves accountable.  I know a lot of people who are very passionate about fitness and leading a healthy lifestyle.  If you can't stand when people post about their well being and making the extra effort to get to some place that may be a struggle to get to for them, then hide them in your news feed.

Many, many, many people post pictures of food.  I still can't wrap my head around this, but I am not passionate about food.  I don't judge my friends who are and do post pictures of food.  They often deserve to post pictures because they are super talented in the kitchen.  Once again, maybe your "friends" are posting their meals to keep themselves accountable for what they are putting into their bodies.  Many people who are watching their weight post pictures for moral support.  If you can't get on board with that then hide their new feed.

Most people my age are now posting about their young children.  They post A LOT about their young children, like when I say A LOT, I mean A LOT.  I love my friends and their kids, so I am not annoyed by this usually, unless they're discussing potty training or ANY THING that is expelled from their children's bodies.  I am actually happy by how in love my friends are with their kids and laugh at what they have to expect, cause I've been there.  I often ask myself, how did people figure things out about parenting before asking all of your friends on Facebook what to do first?  Hey, it's takes a village and I know this from experience, but if you're annoyed by these gorgeous little humans that are our future, then you can always block their news feed.

How to deal with "Negative Nelly" postings on Facebook?  Well, first keep in mind that EVERYBODY has bad days, but if a "friend" is consistently posting negative statuses maybe it is a call for help.  I am not a negative person, but I am real, I will absolutely write a blog that isn't always peaches & cream, so the same goes for my Facebook statuses.  If you don't care enough to reach out to those people who may really be asking for help behind these statuses then hide their news feed and call it a day.

During the past few years from January through April I post a lot about my charity 5k.  I know for a fact that people/my "friends" get annoyed with my incessant begging for their money for the cause that is SUPER IMPORTANT to me.  I have had people come out & tell me how annoying I can be...sorry if I don't give an f*#k.  You can simply hide me on your news feed.
 

The bottom-line is Facebook is annoying.  It's annoying because their are SO MANY different  personalities coming through on your feed.  Probably hundreds.  In one day, Facebook can be political, religious, a comedy show, a networking group, a self-help group, a cookbook, a greeting card, a travel guide, headline news, fundraising efforts & a sounding box.  That is part of the fun of it, right?  There is something about your "friends" that keeps you coming back.  I know how interesting my friends are, I bet yours are just as awesome behind all of those annoying posts.

Surviving motherhood (so far!!)

Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn't know you had, and dealing with fears you didn't know existed.  ~Linda Wooten

I know that this is weird to say, but this year is the first year that I have finally felt like a mom.  Weird, yes I realize, considering I've been called that name for years now.

I have always been very close with my son; having him at such a young age, you can't expect otherwise.  When Bryan was young I was the only one of my friends with a child. I had no clue what mothering was supposed to feel like, I didn't discuss feeling or emotion of motherhood on social networks (they hadn't been created yet), I knew I had to do the best for him by using common sense; putting him first and keep him alive seemed logical.

I looked at it as survival I suppose. I worked A LOT and went to college (although it was briefly, I still went). I came home and spent time with Bryan & did it all again the next day. As he got older, I ran around to different events he was involved with, after school activities, etc.; quick dinners and short showers are how we existed. 

When Mother's Day rolled around, I never thought that the holiday was about me, after all, like I said, I never thought of what I was doing as mothering, but surviving, adapting to the ever changing, and often fatiguing days. If I got through another day of fighting to do homework or sitting at the table until his plate was clean it was a win.  EVERYDAY that we got through without killing each other WAS A WIN.  Sounds familiar, huh?!?

It wasn't until this year,  his 18th year that I felt like, HOLY SH*T, THIS MOM STUFF IS FOR THE BIRDS. Yes! I said it.  Some days this how we (moms) feel.  Shitty of me to write it for the world to read, oh well. If you haven't felt that way you're a better person than I.

This year I lived it.  He was causing sleepless nights, not like when he was little, these sleepless nights were not due to feeding schedules, bad dreams or cleaning up vomit (one might call that mothering), but my sleepless nights were now spent thinking: is he going to get in to school?  If he does, where is the money going to come from?  Then it flipped to...he has to find a job?  When the HELL is he going to find a job?  Get off your ass and find a job, please, for the love of God?!?  OK...if I ask him to move out, where would he go?  Is he going to hate me?  Will it sever out relationship?

All those sleepless nights made for VERY TERRIBLE days.  My whole demeanor had changed.  I needed to be a MOTHER and this is the hardest mothering months I had to face in 18 years.  Mainly because most of these things that kept me up at night were out of my hands.  I could only do so much and leave the rest to God.  

I sleep now.  I see my son on a pretty regular basis, my heart is not heavy and my thoughts are more clear, more positive.  This person whom the sun rises and sets on for me; this kid who I love to the moon and back is now surviving by himself (for the most part).

Could motherhood be seeing your better self making decisions, good or bad, surviving in today's world?  I guess we should add that to the VERY LONG definition of the word treasured by so many.