The Bee's Knees Fundraiser = Success!!

The generosity of people amaze me.  All it took was one person to ask if The Bee's Knees could be their local charity and the process was in motion.

The Bee's Knees is the team that I started for The Miles for Myeloma 5k walk/run. We have been warriors for Multiple Myeloma since 2010.   That year we didn't make our goal.  We only had about 10 walkers.  It was only the 2nd year of The Miles for Myeloma 5k in Philadelphia, so I kept telling myself that it wasn't too shabby for my first year.  This year my personal goal was to hit the goal that I set for the team and to double the number of walks/runners that I had had in 2010.  I met my goal with the help of the most generous people.  Friends were posting on facebook and forwarding numerous emails to all of their friends.  I couldn't have done it without all of their help.

This past weekend an event for The Bee's Knees was held at a local bar.  During my fundraising for the 5k this year, I had received an email from a stranger.  A friend-of-a-friend.  This stranger told me that he was throwing an event and was looking for a local charity to donate the proceeds to.  He asked if The Bee's Knees could be that charity.  All of the money collected though The Bee's Knees goes to The Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation, a charity that is so close to my heart.  My dad being diagnosed over 2 1/2 years ago with debilitating disease, so of course I had jumped at the opportunity.
This man put on a hip-hop show; complete with raffles, and strippers collecting money for donations bee's, body artists & an artist creating designs in clients hair.  Not something I would immediately think of at all, but the creativity behind it all was truly inspirational and overwhelming.

It turned out to be a fabulous night thanks to this not-so-much a stranger anymore.  He is a good guy who says that he is not done being a warrior for The Bee's Knees.  He says we haven't heard the last from him!!  I say...Thank God!!!!

It's Summatime!!!

You can smell it in the air.  You can feel it in your bones.  You can see the lightning bugs in your yard!!! 

Today, is the first day of summer.  I have always enjoyed the summer, and what is not to love?  Baseball is in full-effect and my son is out of school; with the latter part of that statement comes endless days for him.  Mid-week sleep-overs & bonfires in the back yard are just a couple of the things that I have to look forward to with Bryan.  I never minded.  In fact, I love being asked the question..."Mom, what day is it?"  These perfect days that just ran into each other.

There are so many summer memories.  We all have them!  The memories from way, way back consist of spending days in the pool, ALL day if possible.  Running through the sprinklers, & spending a week with Nanny & Grandpa in Summit, NJ.  No sea shore for us, we were North Jersey bound. There were also those day trips to Dorney Park, Hershey Park & Six Flags.  Around the 4th of July, people would flock to my hometown to go to the local carnival.  They were, & still are one of the very few locations in the area that had fireworks.  People literally took shuttle buses; but we were in walking distance.  Lucky us!!
Then, as we got older we went to carnival after carnival.  Looking back, I think about how gross it was and those carnie perverts.  It didn't stop us (the teenage girls) from flirting to get a free ride.  The New Jersey shore was the spot to be.  We would go anywhere with a beach!!  We made money by baby-sitting or mowing lawns, it didn't matter because we weren't quite old enough to have a "real" job.  We laid out  in the sun ALL day and had our cordless phones next to us, just in case someone called to make plans.
The year that I was pregnant with Bryan was the hottest summer that I can remember.  Continuous days of triple digit temperatures.  I was so uncomfortable and huge (Bryan was born in September).  Summers after that changed...not in a bad way.  I had this itty bitty buddy to bring to the shore and show him everything that the summer had to offer.  He took to the summer like a duck to water.  Jumping in the pool donning his mickey mouse swimmies.  Actually, Bryan is currently down the shore and having a blast. He got his ears pierced on the boardwalk.  When he comes home he'll be making his way to a Katy Perry concert.  He is obsessed and I am not sure it has anything to do with her talent?!?

This also happens to be the summer before Bryan's senior year of high school.  I am hoping that he has a blast this year.  A safe blast, thinking of the consequences of his actions kind of blast, but a blast none-the-less.

Time escapes us faster then we know.  Embrace every perfect summer day that you can & make memories that you'll never want to forget!!

What are your favorite summer memories?  Boys, Flings, Camps?

2 1/2 years old

in Florida, Bryan is 7 years old.

This week Bryan sent me a picture of his new accessory.

Strength in Weakness

Lots of people have described me a s being a strong person.  How could I have gotten through everything that my young life has thrown at me if I weren't, right?  Yea, I am strong!  I used to think it was a bunch of malarkey (I never was really great at accepting compliments), but now I know...I am strong.   
The past couple of months have been a little treacherous.  Rationally, I know things could be a lot worse.  I mean A LOT worse, but sometimes the strength put forth on a daily basis is eroded by bits of tiny snip-its of news.
When one reaches their breaking point people handle themselves in a myriad of different ways.  Recently, my strength fell.  I felt it falling, I saw it falling and I knew I had to catch it.  I decided the best thing to do at the moment was let myself feel.  Feel sad.  Wallow in my melancholy.  Lament.  So I did exactly that, for the next two days I let myself feel.  My friends know that when I get into these "funks" I essentially fall off the face of the earth.  I am unreachable.  They know how I do and they let me. I love my friends.

Anyway, when I went looking for my strength I found it.  It was right here.  I picked it up and knew that I was done being sad.  Granted, the situations in my life right now haven't changed & won't anytime soon, and I will deal with that, but to decompress every once and a while to keep your sanity is OK.  There is nothing weak about letting down your guard, finding strength in weakness and grow as a person.

I have so much gratitude for every breath that I take, for every face that makes or has made me smile or cry.  I have a past & it's not all sunshine, rainbows & flowers, but I am here because I am strong and that means that I also have a future!

Baby daddy

My son Bryan did not just get his awesomeness from me.  I know.  I know.  You all thought he did & really who could blame you?!?  There is this other person in his life that tends to lend a substantial hand in his upbringing, this person is his dad, my ex-husband, Dan.

Despite EVERYTHING that Dan & I have been through, he has always been a good father to our son.  They have a special relationship & always have.   Dan was Bryan's soccer coach for years and was loved by the whole team.  He is also the one who would go on the class trips with Bryan in elementary school.
Sometimes Bryan acts so much like his dad that I want to scream & am totally willing to disown him when he acts out of turn; calling his dad and saying, "Your son..."!  Dan is a superstar in his son's eyes which is all MY doing.  Trust me, Dan and I are civil, but I don't always sing his praises.  I don't EVER disrespect my son's father by speaking negatively in front of him.  That was a rule from the day we separated.  Anyone who is in Bryan's life knew how I felt about it and it wouldn't be tolerated.  Dan was his father for better or worse.  We were young and had no idea what the heck we were doing, but he stayed in his son's life because he wanted to.

Being a dad...I don't know how to do it and have never pretended to.  Dan always keeps his cool, so I never really knew or understood how hard it was for him to be a teenage dad.  He was always the one who knew that we would do OK raising Bryan.  I was always the one who thought that I don't know enough to teach another human being how to live life; raise someone to eventually be a grown-up.  What if we eff him up?  Dan trusted me.  He still trusts me and gives me credit for how great Bryan turned out. 
Today, I tip my hat to him.  This weekend is Father's Day and Bryan will be down the shore with his friends.  Dan is totally OK with this.  They have a great relationship/friendship that I will never even try to understand. (All the burping, farting and spitting grosses me out anyway...& the video games. ugh.)
He is the very best dad that he can be.  I don't always agree with his choices and at times I don't believe that he gives 100%, but I do believe that he gives everything that he can to give to Bryan.  He's pretty helpful to me too, I believe that the greatest gift a father can give his child is to respect their mother.

Happy Father's Day to all the great Dad's out there!!

Daddy's Little Girl

I was always daddy's little girl.  Everything that the man did interested me to the nth degree; whether he was giving the station wagon a tune up or was just changing the oil, I was right by his side.  He built our play house in our backyard, I was handing him a hammer.  I installed air conditioners with him, painted with him, landscaped with him, & fixed toilets, just wanting to suck in any time that I could with my dad; not even thinking that he was teaching me SO much.  Now, I have multiple tool boxes and many DIY skills.

Along with manual labor, my father is very spiritual.  He loves Jesus & would scream it from the roof tops.  I have also inherited this from him.  I am not as vocal about my Faith, but It is and has been instilled in me at a very young age.  My Faith has gotten me through my life.  I have a conscience and try to be the very best version of myself.  It isn't always easy, but I am learning that this process is not one that happens overnight.

My father is also, according to many, a pretty funny guy.  I always thought he was corny, well, because I've heard all his shenanigans over and over.  He makes people laugh on a daily basis and loves to see people happy.  He gets disappointed when people don't "get" him or his style of humor.  I also love to see people happy and my sense of humor is pretty similar to my dad's.  Yes, I am ridiculously corny, but I wouldn't be Sarah otherwise.

By now I think all of you know how incredible I think my dad is, I could go on & on.  His current illness has brought many feelings to the surface; good & bad.  Overall, my dad did a pretty good job with the whole Fatherhood thing...at least with me, daddy's little girl.

Last Stop presents HOCUS POCUS - proceeds to benefit THE BEE'S KNEES!

THE BEE'S KNEES is the team that I lead annually in The Miles for Myeloma 5k walk/run.  My father Jim Burns is currently battling this wretched cancer.  It is a debilitating cancer of the blood plasma which stems from bone marrow. 
When I was planning this years walk, I had asked my friends to re-post donation links on Facebook or forward weekly emails to their friends and family; I wanted so badly to reach my goal.  One night, I received an email from a stranger with the subject 'Interested in donating to The Bee's Knees'.  I opened it and as I was reading I was overwhelmed.  I felt my heart in my mouth, chills and tears in my eyes.  This couldn't be true? I don't even know this guy.  The body of the email had said that this stranger was a friend of one of my long-time friends and he was putting together a show with live entertainment in Doylestown, in June and he was looking for a local charity.  He was wondering if I was interested in The Bee's Knees being that local charity.  He said, I know it won't help for this years (the 5k was in April) event, but it will give you a good start for next year.  More invisible kindness.

On Saturday, June 25th, join me for a night of LIVE ENTERTAINMENT at MUGS ON MAIN STREET in DOYLESTOWN, PA FROM 9 PM -2 AM.  Proceeds and donations to benefit THE BEE'S KNEES!!  Please stop by and say hello!!!

Potential Early Dismissal...Seriously?!?

Can't sleep so you reap the benefits!

Yesterday afternoon I received an email with the subject line reading: "Potential Early Dismissal".  I knew what it was regarding before I even open it and just shook my head while I read the email.  The gist of the email was that since it was going to be so hot (high of 95 degrees), the district is thinking about making it a half day for students, because the students safety is at risk.

Then, I felt old.  I was saying to myself things like "When I was in school..." & "I remember...".  Granted, I never had to walk to school in a blizzard up hill both ways, but there was a time when we were in school and it was HOT and we dealt with it. 
I went to Catholic School for 12 years and we never had air conditioning.  I remember the teachers in grade school opening all of the windows, pulling down the shades, telling us to put our heads on our desk and 'think cool thoughts'.  Cool thoughts?  If I was anything like I am today I probably over-thought that phrase and was probably imagining what it would be like to meet Kirk Cameron (what?  back then that would've been a REALLY cool thought!).  Cool thoughts?  Hmmm...today it would be Jayson Werth, but anyway, I doubt I was thinking igloos and freeze pops.  My point is those brief periods of mini-meditations of sorts, got us through to the end of the day & the bus ride home.  OH!  The boys, those poor boys had to wear slacks (& in high school those slacks were wool) until the very last day.  Jeez-O-Man.

What has changed in the youth of today?  Are they made of wax?  I understand that a handful of kids may have issues with the heat, but most healthy kids, in my opinion can deal with the season changes as they come.

Since the district sent this memo out to all parents, you know that this will come into fruition; they have already planted the seed...

Just think, it is only June!

I doodle arrows.

My main job at The Title Offices is schedule coordinator;  meaning that I schedule loans to close in 4 states. This also means that I speak on the phone A LOT!!  While I am speaking to various clients and borrowers scheduling my little heart out, I am taking notes.  My co-workers have noticed that I am an arrow drawer.  It was yesterday at work after a difficult scheduling request (sounds impossible, but it happens), I look at my notes and there were more then a half a dozen arrows all over my paper.

I had decided it was time to Google this habit of doodling arrows to see just how screwed up I really am. The term 'doodle' in Old English refers to a dumb person (hey now...watch it!).  In present day they are referred to as indescribable, incomprehensible collection of lines. (Noooo, I know I am doodling arrows).   As most know, doodles are expressions of the subconscious mind and can reveal  a lot about a persons temperament and mood at the time.  The size and position of the doodles are also indicators of the overall meaning.
Apparently, as I was finding out, there was a lot to research to do about my arrows, but to keep a long story short: arrows indicate a person who is aggressively ambitious, a determined mind who wishes to reach ones mark; an arrow can also represent direction and ambition.  If drawn aggressively, which mine are, it means that one has a desire for action.  Doodling arrows has masculine associations, hmmmm...

It turns out that I am not crazy, but a masculine girl who is ambitiously active!  Watch out world...here I come!!

"OH SH*T!!" No one made it...

We delivered "the goods"; "the goods", being my dad, to the University of Pennsylvania last night.  They didn't end up calling my parents to let them know that a bed was ready until after 6 pm.  Thank goodness my mom made the decision to catch a train as start down to the city about an hour before the call. When we arrived we had to wait an hour for the room to be clean.  We were thinking this must be a hell of a hospital room!! & it was!!!

When we got up to his floor and were waiting at the nurses station where we happened upon this wall;

 where I immediately looked and was puzzled by the lack of photos in the frames, then my mom caught my quizzical look at the wall.  Finally, Pop turned around...he shocking said, "OH SH*T!  No one made it." and laughed...
He still has his sense of humor!  Like I said he expects you to laugh and be fun.  No gloomy Guses in his presence.

His biggest fear was that we had to take the 11 pm train home & that we might run into hoodlems.  I reassured him that I had it covered.  I'm not sure that he believed me, but I knew that we were going to be just fine.  I take combat classes afterall.

Pop will be in the University of Pennsylvania for a couple more days until they can lower his blood's viscosity to a normal, more healthy level.  While he is not happy to be a patient, I know that he is the best hands in the tri-state area for his type of cancer & if anything was to happen he is being well taken care of.  I know this makes my mom less anxious and right now she needs to grab any break she can get. 

Hyperviscosity Syndrome, you SUCK!!

I received some crappy news today.  I know there are other, more mature adjectives for this news, but crappy, that is what I am going with.
My Pop, has to be admitted to the hospital at The University of Pennsylvania.  He will be receiving in-patient treatment for a rare side-effect from the Multiple Myeloma called Hyperviscosity Syndrome (HVS).  This syndrome causes a thickening of the blood.  We were told that this condition is pretty dangerous because the thickness of the blood could make his veins tear, his heart malfunction, there is even a possibility of a coma. 
Holy Moley that is a lot to digest.  Right now he is home waiting for the call that a bed is available.

My dad would never admit it, but he must be terrified.  I know I am terrified for him & of course, super helpless.
My mom is so exhausted, when she called me to let me know how the appointment went, the sound of her voice said it all.  Sometimes, I think she needs the thoughts and prayers that I am asking for for Pop.  This is not the first time she has been the care-taker for a cancer patient; afterall, my brother had cancer at the age of 15.  If you ask me there is NOTHING harder on a parent then childhood cancer.    He is now in his 40's and completely healthy. She also traveled up to Northern New Jersey a few times a week to help my grandmother care for my grandpop while he was ill.  This is not something that anyone should have to get used to, but she is a warrior for the people that she loves.


Anywho...as much as I loathe cancer and what it is doing to me & my family, I trust that EVERYTHING will work out the way it is supposed to.  Pop is the one who instilled that in me.  He hasn't lost Faith, in fact I think he has become more faithful if that is possible.  He would NEVER want me to give up.  Never stop laughing and having fun.  That's just Pop; always with a cheesy joke & a smile.  It is hard & I am scared, but cancer WILL NOT impose on my spirits.