Today has been one complete week since I had gone to the gym, while that may not sound like a big deal to most, it totally is to me. When my gym peeps start leaving messages on my Facebook wall wondering where I am, you know too many days have gone by. To be honest, I got a second job. I don't work a ton of hours at my second job yet, but I am working and it is EXHAUSTING!!! Seriously, I was not expecting this. I usually work out a minimum of 4 or 5 days a week, how could a second job be wearing me out the way it is?!?
I did get to the gym tonight with zero intention on going to a class. Tonight I needed to run. Tonight I didn't want to hear a cheery voice in front of the class pushing me to nth degree. Tonight I needed the rhythm of the run. My time running is very much like meditation. I focus on the rhythm; my steps and my breath. Yes, I do have music playing on my iPod, but most of the time I am thinking about nothing. If anyone mediates that is the ultimate goal; to clear your mind of everything. (not always an easy task!)
I absolutely needed this tonight, just needed the peacefulness that I knew was within. I am so glad that I found it.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Monday, August 29, 2011
Shaking my fist at YOU August! Jerk.
Just when you think one month has handed you enough, it can only get uglier when a hurricane is in the forecast. The network news started beating us over the head with Irene days before she was set to enter the Northeast United States. I may be paranoid or maybe I am having a really really hard time these days liking our government, but I think that they may have over-played how bad the storm was. I know from pictures and new stories that there are places that got hit by Hurricane Irene very badly and I hope that those families are safe. My own power didn't come back on until last night; but for gas stations to be sold out of gas 24 full hours before one drop of rain fell is ridiculous. The network news stations were telling people to make sure that their cars were filled and if they needed to, head west. They were also telling people to buy the supplies needed to make sandbags to prevent flooding; go out and buy ice and bottled water. I honestly think that the government road the news of this storm and played us, the puppets that they master, to spend money, money that none of really have, for fear of our safety; when in many circumstances there was very little to fear. Like I stated earlier, I may just be paranoid...
Today, my son & I had our 6 month dental check-up. I generally like my dentists & my hygienist, I make my appointment with the same one every visit, except for today. Today, I got Cathy, the hygienist from hell, since my normal hygienist was on vacation. This woman made the one full hour that I was in that chair a terrible dental memory. She had a heavy hand, and let's face facts, no one wants a heavy handed dental hygienist. Now, I am not one to let someone put me in pain (or accuse me of not flossing) with out fighting back. I went into bitch mode, at one point I even pushed her hand out of my mouth. Hint, hint, I am paying you for this service so ease up. The hygienist that was working on my son came in to my exam room to tell me how great Bryan was, how charming, & handsome; all the while I was thanking her, I was saying with my eyes, 'HELP MEEEEEE'! She didn't pick put on it. AWESOME. I knew that she knew my feelings when she went to make my appointment and said "Would you like to make your appointment for the same time and day? Don't worry, I normally don't work Monday nights." I said, "ABSOLUTELY!!"
The good news is that there are only 2 more days left in the God forsaken month. The bad news is that there are still 2 more days left.
Today, my son & I had our 6 month dental check-up. I generally like my dentists & my hygienist, I make my appointment with the same one every visit, except for today. Today, I got Cathy, the hygienist from hell, since my normal hygienist was on vacation. This woman made the one full hour that I was in that chair a terrible dental memory. She had a heavy hand, and let's face facts, no one wants a heavy handed dental hygienist. Now, I am not one to let someone put me in pain (or accuse me of not flossing) with out fighting back. I went into bitch mode, at one point I even pushed her hand out of my mouth. Hint, hint, I am paying you for this service so ease up. The hygienist that was working on my son came in to my exam room to tell me how great Bryan was, how charming, & handsome; all the while I was thanking her, I was saying with my eyes, 'HELP MEEEEEE'! She didn't pick put on it. AWESOME. I knew that she knew my feelings when she went to make my appointment and said "Would you like to make your appointment for the same time and day? Don't worry, I normally don't work Monday nights." I said, "ABSOLUTELY!!"
The good news is that there are only 2 more days left in the God forsaken month. The bad news is that there are still 2 more days left.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
shaken not stirred
Earthquakes. I can only remember feeling a couple in my life; they are just not something that happens in the Northeast too often, so today at work while I was sitting at my desk and my chair started to move, I thought that it was one of my co-workers messing around with me and shaking my chair. I turned around ready to elbow him in the hip and he wasn't there. Well, then what the heck was going on? My desk was shaking along with my computer monitor. My boss, yells out from his office, "Does anyone else feel that shaking?" He must've thought that he was going crazy too. It turned out to be an earthquake originating from Virginia that was recorded as 5.8 in the Richter Scale, it went right up through the Eastern coast to New York. Truth be told...I thought it was pretty cool, but that was the topping on the drama cake that I call, August 2011.
This month started started out with some weird news, but nothing that I couldn't handle. No big deal. I was even offer a job that I had applied for as supplemental income. Nice! Enter food poisoning...I got extremely sick; should have been hospitalized type of sick, but my orientation for the 2nd job was in 24 hours and I had to go if I wanted the job. The whole time all I could think of was: what if I pass out, vomit or worse (I think you know where I'm headed with "worse")? I made it without incident, but was laid up for several more days.
Early morning, August 19th, Bryan & I had an unexpected & unwanted visitor. Around 12:30 a.m. I hear a scream ("MOM!!!!!!") that I really have only heard in a horror movie and certainly NEVER from MY son. I shot up out of bed and replied; that is when he let me know that there was a bat in the apartment. My first reaction...I pulled the covers over my head. I saw this thing flying back-and-forth though my itty bitty attic style home. Holy crap. Bryan took the dog and hid in our bathroom and I shut the door and found a safe haven in mine, that is until I hear my son yelling "Mom, he's coming for you!", then I see this creature crawling through the crack under my door. I screamed. I screamed loudly, ran out, and trapped the bat in my room with a towel blocking the crack. My immediate reaction at that point was to call the police, I was not sure what they were going to do, but I needed help and it was now after 1 a.m., when the police showed up they gave me a couple of numbers for animal control and wildlife rescue; obviously they weren't picking up. The policeman kindly offered to help catch the bat and set him free, so we came up with a plan. I handed him a sheet and I blocked the door with another, there was no way this bat was getting past US!! We tried to put our plan into action, but there was no bat. Bryan and the policeman looked high and low and it had disappeared. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!? The police left. UGGGGGHHH. How am I supposed to sleep with a bat potentially hiding in my apartment? Bryan, all the while donning his Batman shirt, said "Do you hear that?" I didn't hear anything, but he did. He took off his sneakers, climbed on my bed the took an antique piece of pottery down and went outside. The bat had found a comfy place inside my kettle. My son, the bat whisperer, saved the day.
I may or may not be suffering a bit from PTSD. I am better now, but the next couple of days were a little brutal.
What does the rest of August hold? This Saturday Bryan will be taking his driver test. Now, this is a huge thing in the life of a 16 year old. The only thing I dread is that lately everything Bryan touchs seem to break. He sits on our fence, breaks it, tries to dry is clothes in the dryer, breaks it. Needless to say, I am not really hyped for him to be driving my car. It may be a piece of crap car to most, but it is all that I have for this moment.
So, August, this year you have been less then well behaved and I am glad that it will be a another 11 months until I am exposed to you again, but with all these tiny (in the grand scheme of things) mishaps, life goes on. August, you have provided me with stories to tell! I have learned and experienced; while things in my life may be shaken up every once and a while, I will not be stirred into a negative place.
This month started started out with some weird news, but nothing that I couldn't handle. No big deal. I was even offer a job that I had applied for as supplemental income. Nice! Enter food poisoning...I got extremely sick; should have been hospitalized type of sick, but my orientation for the 2nd job was in 24 hours and I had to go if I wanted the job. The whole time all I could think of was: what if I pass out, vomit or worse (I think you know where I'm headed with "worse")? I made it without incident, but was laid up for several more days.
Early morning, August 19th, Bryan & I had an unexpected & unwanted visitor. Around 12:30 a.m. I hear a scream ("MOM!!!!!!") that I really have only heard in a horror movie and certainly NEVER from MY son. I shot up out of bed and replied; that is when he let me know that there was a bat in the apartment. My first reaction...I pulled the covers over my head. I saw this thing flying back-and-forth though my itty bitty attic style home. Holy crap. Bryan took the dog and hid in our bathroom and I shut the door and found a safe haven in mine, that is until I hear my son yelling "Mom, he's coming for you!", then I see this creature crawling through the crack under my door. I screamed. I screamed loudly, ran out, and trapped the bat in my room with a towel blocking the crack. My immediate reaction at that point was to call the police, I was not sure what they were going to do, but I needed help and it was now after 1 a.m., when the police showed up they gave me a couple of numbers for animal control and wildlife rescue; obviously they weren't picking up. The policeman kindly offered to help catch the bat and set him free, so we came up with a plan. I handed him a sheet and I blocked the door with another, there was no way this bat was getting past US!! We tried to put our plan into action, but there was no bat. Bryan and the policeman looked high and low and it had disappeared. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!? The police left. UGGGGGHHH. How am I supposed to sleep with a bat potentially hiding in my apartment? Bryan, all the while donning his Batman shirt, said "Do you hear that?" I didn't hear anything, but he did. He took off his sneakers, climbed on my bed the took an antique piece of pottery down and went outside. The bat had found a comfy place inside my kettle. My son, the bat whisperer, saved the day.
I may or may not be suffering a bit from PTSD. I am better now, but the next couple of days were a little brutal.
What does the rest of August hold? This Saturday Bryan will be taking his driver test. Now, this is a huge thing in the life of a 16 year old. The only thing I dread is that lately everything Bryan touchs seem to break. He sits on our fence, breaks it, tries to dry is clothes in the dryer, breaks it. Needless to say, I am not really hyped for him to be driving my car. It may be a piece of crap car to most, but it is all that I have for this moment.
So, August, this year you have been less then well behaved and I am glad that it will be a another 11 months until I am exposed to you again, but with all these tiny (in the grand scheme of things) mishaps, life goes on. August, you have provided me with stories to tell! I have learned and experienced; while things in my life may be shaken up every once and a while, I will not be stirred into a negative place.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Humans helping humans
Earlier this month there was a tragic accident in my town. This accident did not involve me or anyone that I know, but in a sense it involved my whole world. I am saying this because this accident involved a car full of teens; 2010 graduates from my son's high school. Two of the teens died in this accident and I cannot get them or their families out of my mind.
My son will be going for his driving test next weekend; he turns 17 years old next month. He will be entering his senior year of high school. This accident has hit too close to home for me. Bryan is amazingly responsible, but that doesn't stop me from saying before he leaves to go out with his friends things like, "think of the consequences of your actions" or "I love you and trust you", I even tend to get really corny with "hugs instead of drugs". He generally laughs me off or has some smart reply. I don't care if I say it a million and one times, as a parent of a teenager you can only do so much to protect your child.
It was an early Saturday morning when their parents received that call.
The story has been printed all over the papers & online, countless flowers and memorabilia have been laid at the scene of the accident. Every article states how well loved these boys were; they were lacrosse players, smart college students who were loved by the whole community. My son did not know the boys, having just moved to the area a couple of year ago, but his friends did, and speak about how awesome these kids were to be around.
During the next few days arrangements were made and it became known that one of the families have, like many of us right now, fallen on hard times financially; which made a couple of wonderful souls plan a fundraiser at the local Rita's Water Ice for the family to help with burial expenses.
It is with this news and the thought that if this was to happen, God forbid, to my son I would be in the same situation. I needed to help. I needed to help right now.
I went to my bosses, co-owners of the company that I am employed at, Family Abstract, Inc./The Title Offices, and asked them to get behind me in collecting money and donating what we could to this family. There was zero hesitation; between my two bosses & myself there are 5 teenage boys, the exact amount that were in the car that wretched night. I immediately sent out an office wide email asking my co-workers to pitch in.
The fundraiser was scheduled for yesterday starting at 5 pm. All day it was raining off-and-on, then about 3:30 pm the sun breaks out. It was now hot & the perfect weather for water ice. After work, I was able to drop off what I collected and what my bosses generously donated to the family and friends of this young man.
As I pulled up to this place that I have been to more times then I can count, my eyes filled. I prayed to God that I just keep composed. I ended up speaking to a mom of one of the best friends, she was so shocked and appreciative. She was literally at a loss for words, all she could do was give me the biggest hugs I think I have ever received from anyone. Many of the boy's friend's were working the fundraiser; all so polite and thankful, but all with sadness in their eyes.
Overwhelmed by the whole atmosphere, I walked to my car and wept. I wept because I love my son so so much. I wept because I love my son's friends so much that I trust them with Bryan's life every time he gets in a car with them . I wept for the parents who had to bury their teenage sons. I wept because I felt so blessed to have helped in anyway to lessen the burden of finances so that these people can properly grieve for their son.
My son will be going for his driving test next weekend; he turns 17 years old next month. He will be entering his senior year of high school. This accident has hit too close to home for me. Bryan is amazingly responsible, but that doesn't stop me from saying before he leaves to go out with his friends things like, "think of the consequences of your actions" or "I love you and trust you", I even tend to get really corny with "hugs instead of drugs". He generally laughs me off or has some smart reply. I don't care if I say it a million and one times, as a parent of a teenager you can only do so much to protect your child.
It was an early Saturday morning when their parents received that call.
The story has been printed all over the papers & online, countless flowers and memorabilia have been laid at the scene of the accident. Every article states how well loved these boys were; they were lacrosse players, smart college students who were loved by the whole community. My son did not know the boys, having just moved to the area a couple of year ago, but his friends did, and speak about how awesome these kids were to be around.
During the next few days arrangements were made and it became known that one of the families have, like many of us right now, fallen on hard times financially; which made a couple of wonderful souls plan a fundraiser at the local Rita's Water Ice for the family to help with burial expenses.
It is with this news and the thought that if this was to happen, God forbid, to my son I would be in the same situation. I needed to help. I needed to help right now.
I went to my bosses, co-owners of the company that I am employed at, Family Abstract, Inc./The Title Offices, and asked them to get behind me in collecting money and donating what we could to this family. There was zero hesitation; between my two bosses & myself there are 5 teenage boys, the exact amount that were in the car that wretched night. I immediately sent out an office wide email asking my co-workers to pitch in.
The fundraiser was scheduled for yesterday starting at 5 pm. All day it was raining off-and-on, then about 3:30 pm the sun breaks out. It was now hot & the perfect weather for water ice. After work, I was able to drop off what I collected and what my bosses generously donated to the family and friends of this young man.
As I pulled up to this place that I have been to more times then I can count, my eyes filled. I prayed to God that I just keep composed. I ended up speaking to a mom of one of the best friends, she was so shocked and appreciative. She was literally at a loss for words, all she could do was give me the biggest hugs I think I have ever received from anyone. Many of the boy's friend's were working the fundraiser; all so polite and thankful, but all with sadness in their eyes.
Overwhelmed by the whole atmosphere, I walked to my car and wept. I wept because I love my son so so much. I wept because I love my son's friends so much that I trust them with Bryan's life every time he gets in a car with them . I wept for the parents who had to bury their teenage sons. I wept because I felt so blessed to have helped in anyway to lessen the burden of finances so that these people can properly grieve for their son.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
The Laundry Mat
Last week, the day after I did my laundry, Bryan did his. He went to put his clothes in the dryer and it doesn't work. I blamed Bryan, he blamed me; either way it doesn't work. When I went to do my laundry this past weekend, I had remembered that the darn dryer was broken. CRAP!!
Enter my Laundry Mat Adventurrrrrrrrre (said like Pigs In Space from The Muppets!). I arrive at the laundry mat with my wet clothes & look around for a dryer; while this may seem easy, I haven't been in a laundry mat for years and don't readily know the schematics for said mat. I find two machines and am well on my way to dry clothes. I am rockin & rolling now. Wow, this was going to be a long wait.
As, I am sitting there thinking I should may be grab a drink from the bar at the other end of the strip mall, but then realize that I look disgusting. Well, there goes that idea. The other people in the laundry mat were not people I would normally hang out with. I have my ear buds in, listening to my music, looking around at these people that I have nothing in common with. It was then that it occurred to me what a snob I was being.
I had everything in common with the patrons of the laundry mat that day. I was there among the regulars doing my laundry because I don't have a dryer. I was essentially on their turf, invading their territory thinking I was better. I am absolutely no better then these people; just because we may not have the same language or color skin, doesn't mean that I am any better. I felt like a complete jerk.
I believe that sometimes God puts people in certain situations to humble them. I was absolutely humbled; totally realizing we are all just humans, humans who want the same things in life, whether it be making sure our children do well in school, providing for our families so that food is on the table, or having clean, dry clothes.
Until I can get my dryer fixed, I will be spending more time with the patrons of this laundry mat.
Enter my Laundry Mat Adventurrrrrrrrre (said like Pigs In Space from The Muppets!). I arrive at the laundry mat with my wet clothes & look around for a dryer; while this may seem easy, I haven't been in a laundry mat for years and don't readily know the schematics for said mat. I find two machines and am well on my way to dry clothes. I am rockin & rolling now. Wow, this was going to be a long wait.
As, I am sitting there thinking I should may be grab a drink from the bar at the other end of the strip mall, but then realize that I look disgusting. Well, there goes that idea. The other people in the laundry mat were not people I would normally hang out with. I have my ear buds in, listening to my music, looking around at these people that I have nothing in common with. It was then that it occurred to me what a snob I was being.
I had everything in common with the patrons of the laundry mat that day. I was there among the regulars doing my laundry because I don't have a dryer. I was essentially on their turf, invading their territory thinking I was better. I am absolutely no better then these people; just because we may not have the same language or color skin, doesn't mean that I am any better. I felt like a complete jerk.
I believe that sometimes God puts people in certain situations to humble them. I was absolutely humbled; totally realizing we are all just humans, humans who want the same things in life, whether it be making sure our children do well in school, providing for our families so that food is on the table, or having clean, dry clothes.
Until I can get my dryer fixed, I will be spending more time with the patrons of this laundry mat.
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